Living Well 2.0

Make Your Bed – my guest room

Howdy, y’all – is everyone hanging in there?  Looking back on recent posts,  I realized that I’ve only posted once a month lately. That’s such a difference from my old bi-monthly “bursting with new things to share.”
New make-up, skin care, or beat-the-heat beauty tips… I don’t have any to offer, and who really cares about that? Styling your outfits… heck, I’m not really going anywhere that requires outfits, are you?

Don’t get me wrong,  I haven’t given up on myself… I’m not walking around looking like “the the Wreck of the Hesperus” nor living the grunge life!  While it may take more energy than I have some days, I do shower, blow my hair dry (even gave myself a haircut this morning!) and put on eyebrows. Self-care is important… maybe more than you realize. Taking good care of myself helps keep me in the moment, in my body, and feeling valued.

These are the same reasons I make nectar and fill the hummingbird feeder, clean and refill the birdbath, and stand out in this heat to water my garden. Yes, it helps all of the birds, bees, and butterflies, and by helping them, I help myself stay grounded. Sane. Connected.

I’m sure that by now you, too, are beginning to realize that things aren’t  “going back to normal.”

There are a lot of changes afoot, and many of them a long time coming. So, how best to deal?
By realizing that Change is the only constant there is. And by realizing  that willingness to change, adaptability, is the key to living well.

Adapting helped me learn to live well with multiple chronic illnesses years ago, and to recover again after the strokes last year. When the pandemic began, I remember feeling bit smug, and “uniquely suited” to handle this new experience. Ninety percent of the time I can. I learned to manage my feelings of loneliness, powerlessness, and patience while recovering from the stroke. I became familiar with new technology; using Zoom, FaceTime, and Google Duo to “see” my friends and family, have online doctor visits, and even do my group therapy online!

But, every once in a while I feel freaked out, sick, and off kilter – like everyone else. How can I make myself feel better?
I know I did it before… how can I do it now? To that end, I pulled out my book and re-read it to see how to apply what I’d written to these circumstances. Living Well 2.0 in the Time of Corona. Each chapter reminded me of ways to feel more present and less worried. This read-through, my favorite chapter is “There’s No Rut in Routine.”

Rumi said, “Life is a balance of holding on and letting go.”

My days begin by making my bed. First thing every day.  I was surprised by how many friends poo-pooed it, but it felt important enough to me to include in my book and give it a chapter of its own. I felt validated in my bed-making habit when I heard Naval Admiral Wm. H. McRaven’s commencement speech to the 2014 graduating class at University of Texas, Austin.

A Navy SEAL for 36 years, McCraven offered this simple lesson and its importance to him: “If you make your bed every morning you will have accomplished the first task of the day. It will encourage you to do another task, and another, and another.  It will also reinforce the fact that little things in life matter. And, if by chance you are having a miserable day, you will come home to a bed that is made, that you made, and it gives you encouragement that tomorrow will be better.”

I find that outer order gives me inner calm… and it is one of the few things I can control. If you don’t already, try making your bed daily for a week and see if it makes you feel better. If you do, pick another small task you’ve been avoiding, and give it your attention, then please let me know how it went in the comments. I love hearing from you all.

XO Donna

 

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to accept the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”

 

 

 

 


Little Miss Sunshine

Apropos of nothing, I awoke this morning humming the old tune, “I’d like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony,” and thinking, “but first, I’d like to teach them to spell.”

This was probably because of a package of pencils with common grammar issues imprinted upon them! I’ve always jokingly (and perhaps tastelessly) included myself among the Grammar Nazis; those sticklers for knowing and using proper grammar and spelling.

Wrong use of words like “could of” rather than “could have,” and using “your,” when you mean to say “you’re,” (you are) in a sentence are like fingernails on a blackboard to me. You, too?

Good Grammar

Speaking of, a darling friend in California who is also a stickler for good grammar  sent me a pack of grammar police pencils as a gift, so I’m sure that accounts for part of my waking thoughts…  but how that 1971 Coca Cola commercial worked its way into my consciousness, I’ll never know.

The world could definitely do with a bit of love and kindness right about now… maybe “sharing a Coke and a smile” would go a long way toward that?

Just as I sat down to finish this post, an old friend called to see how I was faring in these terrible, terrible times. Her words, not mine.  “There’s nothing but bad news everywhere I look!” she said. After listening to her “awfulize” for a few more moments, and not wanting to lose my sunny buzz, I interrupted her (even though it was rude to do so) and told her that of course there was good news,  I subscribe to a weekly newsletter full of good news from around the world. It took her a second to regroup. “Really?” she asked, incredulous.

I know that it can be very compelling to focus on everything that’s wrong and negative, but I also know that inspiration, motivation, and hopefulness can be found when we look for them. I was glad she called so that I could redirect her, remind myself, and share this with you.

Many of you know who David Byrnes is – the British-American singer, songwriter, and musician of Talking Heads fame. He is the founder of an aptly-named newsletter that thrills me every time it shows up in my inbox:  Reasons to Be Cheerful. They call their project “tonic for tumultuous times,” and I’d have to agree. Here’s the link: http://reasonstobecheerful.world
I hope you will take a look and that you find it as uplifting as I do.

I’ve also been keeping my spirits up by exercising, and in the process I get to see my BFF regularly since Holly teaches Nia, a movement class “for every body.”
With the advent of the novel corona virus, her classes have now become available live on Facebook and are reaching everyone worldwide! I credit regular exercise for helping me recover from my stroke and it’s side-effects. Feeling ill last week, and consequently not exercising for 8 days, I’ve noticed some of the numbness and tingling have returned… so I’m back on track this week!

Nia classes with Holly

Exercise is proven to release “good chemicals” in our brain, lubricate our joints, boost our circulation, and increase our range of motion, and stamina… which ultimately lifts our spirits.

Holly’s online presence is just as wonderful as her live persona… she has a way of making her love of movement enjoyable and accessible to all.  So many of the complaints people attribute to aging and illness are really just the result of a sedentary lifestyle. Since I’m no longer young, and I live with chronic health issues, I can’t begin to imagine how “old” I’d feel if I didn’t push the furniture aside and exercise regularly!

 

 

 

 

 

Plato said, “Lack of activity destroys the good condition of every human being, while movement and methodical physical exercise save it and preserve it.”

Cheers to kindness, a bit of exercise, and preserving a sunny attitude.
XO Donna

 


Learning Curve

Trying new things can be either an exciting and rewarding learning experience, or fraught with anxiety if, like me, you hate to get it wrong.

I was raised by a “failure is not an option,” father. No learning curve allowed. I was expected to do everything right, right off the bat. Many parents, and some grandparents, mistakenly think that this attitude presses kids to do their best. But, pressure stifles a sense of wonder and experimentation, and diminishes the self-confidence necessary to try something repeatedly until you succeed. Often  these feelings carry forward into adulthood.

These days I’m adhering to a new school of thought, “Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly.”

Fifty years later, after some therapy, and online access about how to do anything, PLUS a global pandemic… heck,  “Time is on My Side.”  I not buying into  “can’t teach an old dog new tricks!”  That’s just an excuse, not a fact.  I have been trying lots of new things, straying from the comfort zone of the things I know how to do well, and having quite a few interesting outcomes!

Heavenly Blue morning glories.

First, I planted morning glories, and they took forever to sprout. Like a good Jewish Mother, I checked on them daily encouraging them to grow babies, grow. Only three out of the six seedlings made it, but they are strong and happy.  I also planted a Shishito Pepper and some Thyme and Oregano in a big pot in the sun. I talk to them too, and they are all thriving! We ate my first handful of peppers sautéed with shrimp for dinner  the other night.

Oregano, Thyme, Shishitos

Then, I had an applesauce cake FAIL.  A familiar recipe, except that this time I used French flour that I ordered from Amazon. I’d  heard that people who react badly to American wheat are able to tolerate this better.  What I didn’t know is that without adjustments, it would come out so dense.  How dense was it, Donna?  It was as dense as an apple-scented fire log.

In it’s favor, it was beautiful.

After lots of research on why this happened, I learned that this type of flour (t45) is usually reserved for pastry and cookies.  It’s lower gluten creates much less sponginess, and the fineness of the flour  soaks up much more liquid than I could have imagined. The Gremlins won that round as I threw it in the trash.

Still a little bummed-out, I decided to try a new recipe for cornbread, since I’ve  been making the same cornbread for 40 years. Although the recipe is from a cookbook I’ve enjoyed many things from, their cornbread was a disgusting failure. No idea why… absolutely none at all. Into the trash it went, too.  Another win for the Gremlins.

Reluctant to waste any more hard-to-come-by ingredients,  and trying to bolster my sagging ego, I pulled out a tattered Ina Garten corn muffin recipe that I’d scribbled on an envelope and carried around for years, but never baked. They were unequivocally the  most delicious corn muffins I have ever eaten! They were perfect with a pot of chili for dinner,  and still perfect when split, buttered,  and toasted the next morning with my coffee.

Of course they’re delicious, they’re by Ina Garten!

Ina is one of two or three people on my “People I’d Love to Meet” list. When I was very ill years ago and couldn’t eat, could barely get off the couch, she was the bright spot in my day as I’d watch her cooking for her darling husband and friends. I would reminisce about my 25 years living on Long Island, too, and even driving around the beautiful town where she lives. I fantasized about being  invited to her house to chat with her as she cooked, and afterward, eating a beautifully prepared meal with her .

(If any of you have connections to Ina, and can arrange it, I’m game!)

So, without any further ado, here is the recipe that gave me so much delight this week:

Ina’s Corn Muffins

Mix 3C flour, 1 C sugar, 1 C cornmeal, 2TBSP baking powder, 1.5 tsp. salt in large bowl.
Whisk 2 sticks butter, melted and cooled, 2 XL eggs, and 1.5 C milk together. Add wet to dry. Don’t overmix the batter, quick and easy does it.
Scoop into 12 lined muffin cups, bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 25-30 mins. Halves easily for 6 muffins.


What’s New?

I almost added “Pussycat!”  I’m dating myself, I know, but… it’s good to be silly.

Passover has come and gone, and all I made this year was a bowl of haroset: minced apples, walnuts, raisins, dates, a few drops of wine, honey and cinnamon. I can’t even remember what else I cooked for dinner, but I know that I enjoyed the fruit even more the next morning, on my Greek yogurt!

And Easter has come and gone without a Peep. Or any dyed eggs, or even a chocolate bunny.

The days have mostly lost their definition, blurring into each other (except for Tuesday, therapy day, the anchor for my week). One way I’ve been filling them is with baking bread for the guys and grain-free treats for myself. Then my oven died. It not only interrupted my baking for a whole week, but my dinners as well. Fortunately it is fixed now and heats faster and more evenly than ever. To celebrate my “newish” oven, I made bread from James Beard’s cookbook – which I somehow never returned to the library when I moved to Texas in 1978. (Yes, I feel a little guilty every time I use it.)

My sweetie and I have been walking together pretty much everyday, and since everyone else here is too, there’s a lot of effort expended to maintain physical-distancing on our sidewalks. It’s become so crowded, this morning we decided to drive to one of the neighborhood wilderness trails. With almost nobody there, we got to enjoy the birds, the fields of flowers and butterflies, stately old pecan and oak trees, and mowed niches with benches beside a flowing creek. It felt as though we had wandered into Paradise.

Have you had an online doctor’s appointment yet? I just had my first “conference” with my cardiologist this morning. It was very nice to see her smiling face, and between my blood-pressure cuff and my Apple Watch, I had all the info she needed. I don’t need to see her for six more months. Hopefully the world will be closer to normal by then… whatever normal is.
I really enjoyed not having to drive an hour to see her. I could get used to this!

I’ve also been making a lot of art, and for the first time in my life I feel no need for it to be perfect… I’m enjoying it just for the sake of creating.

If you like coloring, like I do, some art museums and art institutes are now making their collections available as coloring books for you andyour kids, or grands, to play together and learn. Visit ColorOurCollections.org.  And for tours of museums around the world: https://www.travelandleisure.com/attractions/museums-galleries/museums-with-virtual-tours

Yours in Health,
Donna


Semi-Brave New World

Everything is completely different than it was two weeks ago… who could ever have imagined?

And yet today dawned sunny and warm, the birds alternate between singing and giving us dirty looks from their cruddy, almost dry birdbath. Thank heavens this isn’t a Hitchcock movie…

I’m anxiously finding my way through these turbulent times, how about you?

Everything here in our “senior community” has been completely shut down (I’m talking Ghost Town) for two weeks. But I’ve found yoga online. And my BFF is doing her NIA classes live beginning today. Something fun to add to my daily walks. Have you found any online exercise you like?

The Coffee Break Creativity group that had just begun meeting has moved to working together online, also. By sharing artistic goals we want to achieve, and before & after photos, we are all still connected.

Even my group therapy session happened online yesterday. Seeing everyone’s dear faces onscreen reminded me of Hollywood Squares. Remember that old show?  It was so zany and risqué for it’s time!

 

Afterwards, my sweetie and I had an appointment with a lawyer. Their office followed the most stringent cleansing and social distancing standards imaginable – we could have done surgery in there!  But, I still signed all my papers with my own pen. After talking about this for years, our wills and our medical directives are now finished.

Do you have a will and medical directives? Does your family know your wishes?  People avoid talking about this, but it is actually a generous gift to your family.

At the most difficult time ever, they will know how to carry out your wishes, and it will give them a sense of direction and purpose when needed the most. Just try to make sure your wishes are reasonable…

Obviously, we couldn’t give my sister the “Viking funeral” she wanted: A flaming boat set adrift in the river behind her home floating toward Lake Michigan would probably have violated every city, county, and state ordinance on the books. And I’d probably be writing this to you from jail.

 

After the lawyer’s office,  we braved the grocery store. It’d been more than eight days since our last trip and neither of us really wanted to go. I was anxious, to say the least. We both felt a little safer when we saw that they had their social distancing down to a science!

Unfortunately, the shelves were almost bare, and the weirdest stuff was unavailable – not a can of baking powder or box of baking soda to be found. Nary a packet of yeast. I’m very adaptable, and a resourceful cook, but for some reason the sight of an absolutely empty baking aisle pushed me over the edge – I fought back my tears and hurried along.

Today I must catch up on my English Grammar class (I’ve fallen behind) and bake a couple of loaves of sandwich bread.

I am counting my blessings: my family and tribe are all well right now, I get to see them online. I’m making a donation to the local Food Bank. And I’m sending out blessings for those on the front lines: all of the  medical personnel, and technicians and researchers, and public servants braving this virus, all of the workers who can’t work. And to you, friends, may you all be healthy and well.

XO Donna

 


Gotta Have Friends

 

 

I’ve been thinking about this post for a while, and finally found the perfect opening in this (adjusted) quote by John Donne:

“No woman is an island, entire of itself; every woman is a piece of the entire continent, a part of the main.”

After having a stroke last year, my continuing heart problems coupled with the physical and emotional numbness I felt made me withdraw. I’ve always bounced back from problems before, but this time felt more like a “SPLAT!”

I tried to stay active on social media because it felt like connection, but I found myself feeling isolated and depressed. I’ve never felt either way before, so I kept hoping it was a temporary situation and that it would pass.

Although I’ve seen people share EVERYTHING on social media, I wasn’t one of them, and I was too embarrassed to admit to anyone how I was feeling…  unwilling to give voice to it.
After months of feeling this way, I finally called my dear therapist, whom I haven’t worked with in years, and began group-therapy again.

(Side-note: I have two fantastic female therapists, a cozy uplifting space that feels like “home,” and five wonderful people who are my understanding mirrors. I highly recommend group over ‘one-on-one.’)

I was in a doctor’s office last week when I came across an article in GH entitled “Friends With Benefits.”  Catchy title, but not what I thought at first (I know, I should get my mind out of the gutter).  It’s about all of the ways that friendships boost our health and well-being:

  • Friends lower our stress, because when we are with them our levels of progesterone increase, decreasing our stress and anxiety.
  • Women between 50-79 who had more support from their friendships lived longer.
  • Women with breast cancer who have strong social networks also have better odds of survival.
  • People over age 80 who have more positive social relationships also had the memory function of middle-agers.

According to the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, “The depth and breadth of your social connections will impact your health just as much as diet and exercise.”  Did you know that older adults are more at risk for developing hypertension from social isolation, than from diabetes?

The take-away: our friendships are just as important as taking good care of ourselves.

Social relationships can buffer some of the effects of stress and help us cope, especially in mid-life when there are a lots of demands in our life: children, aging parents, work, divorce, illness, death. It’s noted that having a large social network was even more important than having high-quality relationships during older age.

By sharing my authentic-self, and trusting my group/therapy, I’m finding the inner-strength to venture out again. I’ve committed to a weekly yoga class. I also accepted a weekly invitation to join a group of creative women and make time to work on my art and words. And I’m bringing grain-free brownies to a get-together with women on my block on Friday.

The importance of feminine friendship and community is at the heart of the book I just finished, Willa’s Grove by Laura Munson. It’s a little more chick-lit than I normally read, but it was just the right medicine for right now.

So, remember to wash your hands thoroughly… and get together with your friends frequently.  To your health!

XO Donna

 

 


Up to Speed

What do you do when you procrastinate?  

I have a friend who works on spreadsheets. My youngest sister cleans. Me, I bake. I have a batch of almond-flour chocolate-chip cookies in the oven as I write. 

So much has happened, I hardly know where to begin. My posts have been sporadic, but I feel up-to-speed now, and I have a new computer to boot. 

I hope it’s true that learning new things is good for our brains, because I am transitioning from PC to Mac… and it’s a little like learning a new language. On the plus-side, my sweetie is pretty fluent in Mac. And I think my iPhone and iPad experiences have helped me. 

Just like all of my years of baking have made the transition to wheat-free recipes easier for me. I mean, look at these gorgeous cookies!

 

I made the PC-to-Mac transition because I was ready to get back to work on the book I began writing before my strokes. However, my computer lacked both the drive and the memory for the necessary updates. I can sympathize.  Encouraged by friends to make the switch, I stalled – afraid of something new and different, of failure…

 But, after weeks and weeks of mulling it over, when I found what I wanted for 25% less than in the Apple store… I was finally inspired to dive in. 

My exquisitely packaged MacBook sat on my desk for more than a week before I was brave enough to even open it. Gosh, I’m really embarrassed to admit that. 

But, here I am, writing you today on my Mac. And wait, there’s more! I also signed-up for an English grammar class taught online through MIT!
I’m excited, and nervous: I think it will be a fun way to get more comfortable with my computer, yet nervous because I chose to be graded, knowing it would make me more diligent. I’ll keep reminding myself of how much I love adventure.

Speaking of which, we sold our motor-home last month. We both have mixed feelings since it was such a wonderful part of our lives. We had a blast, and we have lots and lots of photos to remind us of our wonderful trips. The best part of all is that the people who bought it are the nicest couple ever! We are so happy for them.

A week later, we traded-in our faithful pick-up truck that was now too road-weary, and needed repairs. This seems to be a recurring theme today. LOL!  After joking about Corvettes and Mustangs, we now drive a mid-sized SUV that’s got all of the modern technology anyone could want. Maybe more than anyone wants, truth be told.

It’s sleek, has a couple of nifty features that I find incredibly helpful, it’s gas-efficient, and has a net for my yoga mat and blanket. What more could you want from a vehicle?

All-in-all, things are feeling steadier these days, a perfect environment to flourish in. And who knows what adventure is awaiting us just around the corner, right?

XO Donna


Value Added

 

 

 

 

 

 

If you’re like me, you have probably spent most of your life deriving your value from what you do, rather than who you are.

You’re a wife, or you were. You’re a Mom, or were… but now the kids are grown and flown. You may be employed or you may be an entrepreneur, or perhaps now you’re retired.

All of my life, in spite of hearing that it wasn’t so from the personal growth community, I derived my value from my work, the people I surrounded myself with, the way I looked, the interests that I had, and what I was doing and sharing. I was busy “earning my keep,” so to speak. When it (suddenly) seemed like none of those criteria were being met anymore, I had a minor, okay… a major crisis.

Who the the hell am I without all of that to define me anymore? 

I was feeling worthless, and as it so often turns out, I was asking the wrong question. I should have been asking, “What is it that I value, and do I count myself among those things?”
Curiously enough, this question seems to be popping-up for lots of people.  I noticed today that “Your Inherent Value” was a component of a new workshop a personal coach/friend is offering.
Last week I followed, avidly, a very long and thought-provoking conversation on Facebook all about, you guessed it… your value as an individual human, and how does one determine it.

I realized that our value, or self-worth, can indeed be gotten from what we do, but not from the job itself. For example, it wasn’t what I did for work, I see that my value was determined by the personal qualities I brought to my work: my manners, attention to details, my personal grooming, sense of artistry, conversational abilities, and especially gratitude, toward both my clients and the proprietor who provided space for me to be gainfully employed.

With family and friends, I valued my sense of humor, loyalty, honesty, an open heart and an open-mind. I’m dear friends with people on “both sides of the aisle” and while I don’t always agree with their point of view, I would never criticize, minimize, or cut them out of my life over politics. I value my sense of curiosity, independence, inclusivity, and delight in learning new things. I have had lots of interesting/alternative/life-changing experiences and thus have a unique way of viewing life.

I have slowly (and with the help of therapy) learned that other’s opinions of my value, or of what qualities/things I should value, are about them, rather than me. I can also disregard anything that doesn’t serve me.
It may not have always been the case, but if I were to make a list of all the things I value today, I would definitely include myself on that list.

 

Grateful for you,
XO Donna

 


Undressing Lester

Okay, I can hear y’all wondering, “Who in the world is Lester, and why is she undressing him?”

Relax, Lester is just our Christmas tree, there’s nothin’ funny going on. And, today is Epiphany…the day the wise men showed up, and all Christmas trees come down.

The world according to my mother…

Mom was somewhat strident about the ins-and-outs of Holidays. She knew all of the rules (who decided those rules?) and made sure we observed them carefully. That being the case, our tree did not go up until Christmas Eve because that’s when Jesus was born.

But first the Nativity had to be set up in the living room bay window upon a downy layer of snow. The fact that there was never any snow in Bethlehem did not deter her one bit. She carefully arranged all of the pieces, which she had made and beautifully hand-painted. I especially loved the wise men with their robes and headdresses in exotic colors!

That nativity was the source of much family laughter because my son Jason, who was very young and the only grandchild, swapped-out his toy frog for the baby Jesus.

(For years to follow it was a running joke between the two of them, and he’d replace Jesus with a lump of Silly Putty, a Hot Wheels car, or even a GI Joe).

Mom always got as flustered as Barney Fife when Andy snagged him for doing something stupid again.

She’d cuss and grumble about the sacrilege of it, all the while trying not to laugh as she hunted for both Jason and baby Jesus.

While I do bend her rules a bit; we like to put our tree up two weeks before Christmas, I am still compelled to take it down on the 6th of January.

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This is partly a nod to my sweet Mom, and the self-knowledge that a deadline is the only way it will get done before all the branches are doing downward-facing-dog pose with both needles and ornaments sliding to the floor!

So, that’s what I’ve tasked myself with today, and I’d better get back to it. Do you have Christmas Tree Rules?  Do they even exist? I know of people who put their tree up the day after Thanksgiving – it may be a Texas thing. 

Oh, and back to Lester, the Skinny Christmas Tree… my sweetie and I have had sixteen holidays together without ever naming a tree. Where this came from, I’ll never know. But it made things a little more special to have “Lester’s” sparkling company throughout this season.

Wishing you all Health, Happiness, and Abundant Peace in 2020!

XO Donna


Bare Necessities

Our Mexican Riviera vacation didn’t go quite as I had planned, but you’ve heard the old saying, “You want to hear God laugh, just tell her your plans!”

The trip was easy; the flight is a little over 2 hours from Austin to Cancun. Our pick-up at the airport went much better than usual, too – no wandering around looking for a driver who should be looking for us. We found our ride quickly in the melee, and we were the only passengers in a brand-spankin’ new Chevy Suburban… I felt a bit like a celebrity, tinted windows and all.

We arrived at the hotel with plenty of time to unpack, change clothes and meet our friends for dinner. It is such a delight to be with friends for vacation, isn’t it?  Have you noticed how easy it is to pick-up right where you left off, as if you’d just seen each other a few weeks ago, rather than a whole year ago!

Lesson #1: Like fine wine, friendships grow richer and more special with time.

The next day dawned bright and sunny. We had each reserved a poolside lounge, so we donned swimsuits, dropped our towels, sunscreens, and books on them, and headed to the breakfast buffet. What a day: lounging, chatting, reading, and being waited on the whole time! I even managed to pry myself off of the lounge and make it to the gym to work out! Dinner was especially wonderful because our friends from Montana, whose flight had been scrubbed the day before, had finally arrived. Dinner that night was a dressy affair, and the gang – all 10 of us – were there!

Everything was heavenly… until it wasn’t.

I woke with a torturous stomach ache at 2:30 a.m. I was curled into fetal position praying it would pass, and trying not to whimper and wake my fiancé. It didn’t pass… For the first time in 30+ years, I had gotten the dreaded “turista.”  I’d never heard of anyone getting sick here… lucky me.

For the next 60 hours I never left my room. The first day was wretched, but by evening I was able to relax. And like Greta Garbo, I wanted to be alone. Please dear, get me some ginger ale… and then Go. Have. Fun.

I slept most of the second day, and that night I was finally able to enjoy some fruit and pot of mint tea. The view out my window was great, day and night. My sweetie kept checking-in with well-wishes from our friends, and I kept thanking him, then shooing him away again to enjoy himself..

Lesson #2 – Even though I was sick on my vacation, I was still on vacation.

I didn’t feel like I was missing anything, or my trip was ruined. It wasn’t what I would have wished for, but it was what it was. I practiced “Being Here Now.” (RIP dearest Ram Das). And, did I mention that the view was great?

 

The next day I felt well enough to join everyone again. A sunrise stroll before breakfast let me dip my toes in the Caribbean. A swim in the pool and lots of lounging, and I felt ready for our final dinner together before everyone began leaving the next day.

That is when I learned the last lesson of the trip.

Lesson #3 – When packing for a vacation, pack everything you think you’ll need. Come back later and remove about half of what’s in your suitcase!

I thought I needed lots of options, but too many options = too many decisions, and that = stress. Especially when I have to drag my baggage, literally, through airports.

I brought too many clothes, shoes, books, toiletries, make-up and hair goop. I could barely lift my little carry-on.  What I wore: two jersey dresses, one bathing suit, two sarongs, tights, a tank top and sneakers, a pair of heels, a baseball cap, and flip flops.

The truth is that everything I really needed, other than a few bare necessities, I carried with me in my heart!

Thank you all for being here and reading and commenting. I appreciate you! Happy Holidays and a Healthy, Loving and Abundant New Year.

XO Donna