Dear Austin

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From the first moment we met I was bewitched. You were the most beautiful thing I’d ever laid eyes on, and you became a fun, lively, open-minded companion. The longer we’ve been together the deeper my love grew. Strangers may have thought you were weird, but they didn’t know you as I did: delightfully accepting of everyone, easy-going, and a tad eccentric.

imageAlthough your outer beauty has not paled, you have changed. It began slowly, imperceptibly, then became increasingly obvious.

You’re always in a rush. You’ve got everyone tied up in knots. You’ve become aggressive and often outright hostile…acting as if you’re more important than everyone around you. Nowhere is it more obvious than on the road: speeding, tailgating, texting while you drive (you also eat, apply make-up, and work on your lap-top while you steer with your knees) and take dangerous and stupid risks. Why are you being so rude?

I wish I could say that these bad habits are outweighed by your cooking and the way you can shake-shake-shake a cocktail – after all, when I met you in 1978, you couldn’t even boil water. But, while your abilities are broader and more accomplished, you have become less accessible, less inclusive, and less humanist.  You are turning into a social-climbing conservative.

I will dream of the “old you” and be looking for that everywhere I travel.  While your beauty will always take my breath away,  you’ve gotten just a little too big for your britches, missy!

XO Donna

 

(Note – Today I read that the estimates of people moving to Austin (and metro areas) is now 100 people a day – that makes 3,000/month! We are the second fasted-growing city, right behind Dallas. Our population is estimated at 1.9 million+)

 

 

One step forward…

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Framed bathroom…and two steps back.  My closet still looks like a bomb went off in it.  However, our bathroom is finished, and beautiful!  So sexy-assed beautiful that I keep walking in and admiring it. Feeling the cool surface of the marble. I’ve cleared everything except the essentials off of my counters, and even created an arrangement with a Raku vase, dried roses, and a heart-shaped pottery jar in one corner. I love the counters and faucets polished, and I (almost) hate to brush my teeth in the sink because it makes a mess which I then feel compelled to clean and polish immediately.  (Oh, come on….like you don’t do this with a new toy, too??)

Am I obsessing a little? You betcha!  It’s my way of not dealing with the messy closet that was created in order to create the new bathroom. I made a half-assed attempt to wrangle it back into shape with a trip to Target for new hangers, a jewelry organizer, and some attractive storage boxes. I came home with two out of three;  but not finding  storage boxes kind of left me hanging (no pun intended!). Truth be told….I finally realized that the mess in the closet is a reflection of how I am feeling right now…but, I’m sure any of you could have told me that.   I’m confused, a little bit chaotic.  Simultaneously chomping at the bit, and yet holding back.  Those boxes of stuff, and piles of clothes,  represent parts of me that have hung on a hanger or been in a box for too long, and need to be brought out, and either “added to the rotation,” or released, let go of.  Things that are still useful, but  just aren’t useful for the ‘me’ that I am now.  I know they’ve served their purpose, yet I haven’t found the courage to let go.  Oh, yes, I’m still talking about the clothes. Maybe.

Let me tell you one thing I know about myself  –  at 61 I am still growing and evolving!  This isn’t the first time I’ve felt this upheaval, and I doubt it will be the last.  And that’s okay…it’s just uncomfortable.  (I had an image of a cocoon this morning, and the stress that occurs before the butterfly emerges!)  I’ve always gotten through it, and things have always been better than before!

I have been very lucky to have had many inspirational people in my life.  Two online presences that I rely on right now are:  #1) the always powerful, Danielle LaPorte (www.daniellelaporte.com). This woman is the definition of living large. I mean large in bold print, all caps. LARGE!  And  #2) Marie Forleo (www.marieforleo.com).  A sassyFramed tableau young woman who has a Q & A on Tuesdays that always addresses a relevant issue in a wise, and wise-cracking way!  Today’s topic:  The feeling of something missing in your life.  And having the courage to go for your dreams, take risks, and be willing to look stupid.  (Oh, that…I hate that.)

But her pearls of wisdom were exactly what I needed to hear in order to let go of the past, (make sense out of my closet...) and to be willing to “feel the fear, yet do it anyway! ”

XO Donna