I send you my warmest wishes as 2014 draws to a close…
What a treat that this falls on Christmas Day. No matter what you have planned, I hope your day is wonderful and both your belly and your heart are full.
I am grateful for another year of your readership and support. As Joe Cocker said, “I get by with a little help from my friends.”
Thank you, friends!
XO Donna
To quote John Lennon, “So here it is Christmas, and what have you done? The old year is over, and a new one’s just begun.”
This song touched me the moment I first heard it. It was written by John and Yoko in 1971 as a protest song against the VietNam war, and every year when I hear it I wonder to myself, “What have I done this year? What have I learned? What can I do to help others?”
I’m never sure when making a list (and checking it twice) how long to make it, but since I was the oldest of five girls (yes, five!) I will share my 5 items that I think are both thoughtful and empowering, and that would make fabulous last-minute Christmas or Hanukkah gifts for women on your list.
The Top Ten Things Dead People Want to Tell You by Mike Dooley. Mike is a wise, humorous, and even joyful New York Times best-selling author. If you have lost someone, or are facing that process, this book will help you. It certainly helped me get through the recent loss of my younger sister, Terry.
Money, A Love Story by Kate Northrup. The subtitle is: “Untangle your financial woes and create the life you really want,” and that pretty much says it all. I read it this summer and I then put everything in order and still balance my checkbook almost daily! A great read for gals of all ages!
every woman to quit holding back and “find your voice, your mission, your message.” It was named a Best Book of 2014 by Apple’s iBooks and it’s been called, “the how-to manual we have been waiting for.” I feel very lucky to have an autographed copy, and I can’t wait to dig in to it!Wishing you all Happy Holidays,
XO Donna
In Loving Memory of my sister
Reverend Theresa Kathleen O’Klock-Glick
September 3, 1953 – November 12, 2014
This morning started off as Holiday Hell…and, it wasn’t just me. A close friend called at 8:00 am to share that she was in Holiday Hell, too. “Why is it that I just can’t get in the mood for all of this? I hate Christmas!”
Now she was talking my language. You see, I still work as a hairstylist, and by the time Christmas rolls around our clients all look gorgeous, but we are the exhausted, bedraggled, people you see trying to pull together a dinner while shopping for presents on the afternoon of December 24th. Ho, ho, ho indeed!
We’ve listened to everyone’s plans to travel to exotic places, and to be with their family, (whether they want to or not) and their fears about meeting in-laws, seeing out-laws, ex-husbands, or ex-wives, and blended families, and immersion blender families, out-of-the-teflon-coated-frying-pan….and wait, I’ve segued over to cooking.
And that’s a great place to be, because it’s cold, which always makes me think of snow. Which makes me think of Dr. Zhivago – the most beautiful, snowy movie of all time…and that leads to Russia, and to making Moscow Mules! Something I’m sure no comrade would ever drink, (put what in the wodka??)) but it’s an icy cold, gingery, sensory experience of a cocktail just the same.
Have all of these ingredients on hand, and when you’re in the throes of Holiday Hell, mix up a batch…and as quickly as you can say Putin, everything will be better!
(Note: this is usually served in a copper mug, which Santa can bring you if you don’t already have a set. And the following proportions are mine.)
Per drink:
Now, if you don’t get in the Holiday spirit after a few of these, all you’re going to get in your stocking is a lump of coal. So, cheers! Say it with me, nah zda-ROVH-yeh!
XO Donna
Ever had a day when you can’t seem to do anything right? I have run up and down the stairs 18 times so far (yes, I keep count and call it exercise).
I went downstairs to my desk to balance my checkbook and pay bills online while I enjoyed my coffee. It’s my way of making the process more palatable. I pay attention now (I never did before reading Money, a Love Affair by Kate Northrup) as a way of showing the Universe that I am, indeed, a good steward for my money.
I’m not a good steward of passwords though. I had to find my cheat-sheet, and when I did, I realized two things: 1) I didn’t have all of my online accounts listed, and 2) my coffee was going to be cold by the time I finished this.
After twenty minutes of trying to resolve the most pressing account, I broke down, called my broker and spoke to her assistant. My pen ran out of ink just as she gave me a temporary password, and between finding a new pen and trying to hear over the noise in her office, I needed to ask her to repeat herself three times. Didn’t matter…the password didn’t work after all.
If you haven’t lost a password lately, count your blessings! When you do, you must answer a multitude of security questions “which may, or may not, be based on information which you’ve supplied at some time in the past for your credit report.”
It’s the online equivalent of water-boarding. I couldn’t remember whether an address I lived at more than 25 years ago was Quail Street or Quail Drive and they acted like I was trying to commit fraud. A simpler question was “What was your first car?” Yay, something I know the answer to. I told her that it was a 1955 Volkswagen Beetle. Her response, “No, that’s not correct.” WHAT? Whose life are you looking at?
I told a friend about this, and he said that he’d once been asked his mother’s maiden name. When he answered, they told him he was wrong. Really?
I’m not sure which to be more worried about, my inability to remember everything, or the militia-like state of our password protected accounts. To help myself, I made an exhaustive list of my accounts, my ID numbers, and passwords. Then I put it in a spot that’s easy for me to remember and for any half-assed burglar to find.
The new 11th commandment: Know Thy Passwords.
Or, at least know where to find them!
XO Donna
It’s the time of the year for one of my favorite Thanksgiving movies – “Home for the Holidays,” starring Robert Downey Jr, Holly Hunter, Dylan McDermott, Anne Bancroft, Charles Durning, and directed by Jodie Foster. I see elements of my own family in it, and it used to make me both laugh…and cry. Even though it’s nine years old, most of the elements are still (maybe even more) timely.
I’m going to let Roger Ebert’s November 3, 1995 review tell the story…
‘There is a point in Jodie Foster’s “Home for the Holidays” where a brother and his brother-in-law are fighting on the front lawn while their father tries to break it up by wetting them down with a garden hose. Looking across the street at the neighbors gawking, the father snarls, “Go back to your own goddamn holidays!”
The movie, which is about the Thanksgiving family reunion from hell, is not exactly a comedy but not a drama, either. Like many family reunions it has a little of both elements, and a strong sense that madness is being held just out of sight.
Have we not all, on our way to family gatherings, parked the car a block away, taken several deep breaths, rubbed our eyes, massaged our temples, and driven on, gritting our teeth? That is not because we do not love our families, but because we know them so well.’
Here’s what I have learned about family this past week.
You’ll be surprised how much fun you can have and how well you can all get along. All you need is love. And some bourbon and eggnog. And this great movie.
I wish you all a wonderful Thanksgiving next week!
XO Donna
I woke up this morning trying to remember the lyrics to a song that friends were singing at a birthday party two weeks ago. All I could remember was the refrain: “Younger women, faster horses, more money and older whiskey.”
Today’s my birthday, and I realize that I can’t be a younger woman – but I am happy right where I am. I can certainly be young-at-heart and in body/mind/spirit! As my delightful friend Lee (she just turned 90) said at our lunch on Tuesday, “Honey, you can be old at 30 or young at 90. Your choice!”
Faster horses speaks to the need for excitement and adventure in our lives. I know too many people who have no sense of either. Too bad. You can always expand your horizons and try new things, go new places. My sweet friend, Nancy, took up Tai Chi and Qui Gong in her 80’s.
More money…well, yeah. There are ways to do that, I leave it to you to find one that works for you. Get inspired. There are lots of books on how to create/allow more money into your life. There are many ways, many teachers.
Older whiskey, indeed. I’ll drink to that! I believe that as we get older we can grow to appreciate the finer things in life. We value quality over quantity. Or, we finally realize that we are worthy of them!
Oscar Wilde said, “I’m a man of simple tastes. I’m always satisfied with the best.”
Think personal best here, and don’t settle. When my Mom used to visit, she always loved the delicious, fresh-ground coffee I made in the mornings. However, when she returned home, she would never give herself permission to spend the money. She settled for inexpensive, canned coffee. Let yourself have “the good stuff” you love. Scrimp on something else. You’re worth it!
On my 63rd birthday I know for sure that it’s not about the years in your life, it’s about the life in your years! It’s about living in the moment, being grateful for the life you’ve created, and realizing that you are special…just because you ARE HERE!
All of that from a country song…
XO Donna
I had the idea that blogging would be an “easy” way to start writing. With that in mind, two years ago I attended my first BlogathonATX. I vowed that I would figure out how to do it, and began.
One hundred posts later I have learned a few very important lessons. I’m talking about my experiences writing, but on reflection, everything always seems to be about LIFE.
After 100 posts – Big respect for people who blog consistently and strive to produce well-written content. It’s tough!
After 100 posts – I realize I am going to have to use everything above to submit my book proposal before my birthday next week… the new goal I set at BlogathonATX last week.
I want to thank you all for sticking around, sharing, and commenting.
Big love! Muchas Gracias! Cheers!
XO Donna
And the seasons, they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We’re captive on the carousel of time
We can’t return. We can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game.
Lyrics by Joni Mitchell
A friend said today that “she felt like she was running in circles and getting nowhere on her goals.” Yes, she’s had some trying circumstances this past year, but when I look at her what I see is movement, shift, expansion and a beautiful unfolding.
When we are reinventing ourselves, trying to accomplish something new-for-us, we tend to think that things should move in a straight line. Nothing organic ever does. Julia Cameron – she of the magnificent “The Artist’s Way” – said that “Growth is an erratic forward movement: Two steps forward and one step back. Remember that and be very gentle with yourself.”
Sounds like the recipe for a cha-cha-cha to me. Mojitos, anyone?
Here’s my suggestion when you feel like you are going in circles:
When we are focused on a goal, or a dream, it’s easy to lose track of everything else we are accomplishing – the other vital pieces of our puzzle that will nurture us and help us get where we want to go. And always remember to take time to stop and smell the flowers. Many of which, by the way, open in a spiral.
XO Donna
I have earned my “just desserts” today, and have mixed myself a cocktail as I sit down to write this. I’m glad you’re here – I’ve looked forward to this moment all day!
I realized that the month is half gone, I know that’s a “glass half full” way to view it, but because of the nature of my business for the past 30+ years, I tend to count down at this time of year.
11 weeks till New Years Eve. 10 weeks till Christmas. 6 weeks till Thanksgiving. 2 weeks till my birthday. 1 week till Halloween. And 1 day till the house goes on the market. That’s….tomorrow!!!!
Excuse me while I freak out for a minute.
The day we have awaited for so long is here and I don’t feel the least bit ready. I remember feeling this way when I went in to labor. I couldn’t wait to have my baby. I was excited to meet him/her and and to quit feeling so heavy. Earthbound. But the moment the pain began, I wanted to put it off for a while.
Speaking of putting things off – I have just finished painting my darling’s home office. Of course, the day before it goes on the market. Doing this, and cleaning the garage were both put off until they became last-minute items. Before all was said and done, we were upset with each other. Why do we (humans) wait until the last damned minute to get things done? What is it about human nature that we put off doing things until (and pardon me here – I know this is a damned touchy issue) there is a gun pointed at our heads?
Now it’s finished, and beautiful. Whoever buys it will love it. But I feel a little resentful that I had to live in it while it was “ugly and cluttered”. ..the two wicked stepsisters…and I had to become a witch in order to get it done. Oh well, Halloween is next week.
I used to procrastinate, until I learned (only a few years ago) to break things down into small, manageable goals, then maintain a steady pace with an end date in mind. Works like a charm. Also reduces the stress level like you wouldn’t believe! But this wisdom didn’t come about until recently. Trust me, it’s great to learn new things and put them into practice, and I intend to continue this way. I will never stop growing, accomplishing…and enjoying a delicious cocktail at the end of a hard day’s work!
I really do look forward to living in a nice apartment complex where we won’t have anything to maintain anything but our home. What will I do with myself? Facials? Mani/pedis? Lunch with friends? Maybe I’ll finally write the Great American Novel!
I love y’all!
XO Donna
Isn’t that the way it always is? We’ve had to hit the floor, running!
Thankfully, we had a wonderful, exciting vacation. We got there and back quicker than I’d have imagined – thank you Virgin Airlines! If I 
have a choice, I will choose them from now on. And, at their terminal you can get both traditional American fare or sushi for breakfast…or have a flight of delicious Sonoma County wines. Guess which I chose?
We’ve been back for 4 days, and still sorting through photos – I took pics with my little camera, my iPhone, my sweetie’s iPhone and my iPad. I can’t find anything!
Some highlights of our vacation:
If any of you are heading CA way, please send me a note. I will give you info on where we stayed, what we visited, and where we ate. There is such marvelous food everywhere that Denise said, “There must be a law against serving bad food in CA!”
Now it’s time to get busy and get our house on the market next week and sold.
XO Donna
SexyPast60 